Dynaverse.net
Off Topic => Ten Forward => Topic started by: Brush Wolf on December 27, 2005, 01:49:33 pm
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Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they are not
prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting
attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the
stand.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams I've known you since
you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.
You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about
them behind their backs. You think you are a big shot when you haven't the
brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper
pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the
room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't
build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the
worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three
different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney almost died. The judge asked both counselors to
approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you
bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for
contempt.
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LOL, That's my first laugh of the day, Thanks Brush.
Stephen
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Glad to be of service.
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I tell ya, that sounds so much like my Great Grandmother, long gone, But she at one time, Had shut of the Gas to a club across the street. It was back in the 20's, and they had payed To have her Natural gas shipped over there via pipe.
The sherrif Came out, and she took a 2x4 and told him to get the hell away. It turns out, the club was a whore house, and she wasn't about to Help them. The Law backed off, as they had no Legal means, and the sherriff lost his cut on the Whore house.
Stephen